Paradox of Ajossi and Ajumma in Korea

Read about the funny and sometimes frustrating experiences foreigners have with ajossi and ajumma in Korea. Tips for handling long stares too!
KB (Fake Buddies)'s avatar
Jun 01, 2024
Paradox of Ajossi and Ajumma in Korea

Ajossi and Ajumma: The Good and The Confusing

One of my friends, Sarah, shared this interesting paradox. Thank you, Sarah!

Many ajossi (older men) and ajumma (older women) in Korea seem really contradictory when it comes to treating foreigners. Some stare at foreigners all the time, making them feel uncomfortable. Others are incredibly kind and go out of their way to help.

The Staring Ajossi and Ajumma

Sarah often notices that some ajossi and ajumma stare at her whenever she’s out and about. It can feel really uncomfortable and make her self-conscious. It’s like they’ve never seen a foreigner before and are trying to figure out what’s going on. This can be especially awkward in public places like the subway or a café.

Funny Tips for Handling These Stares

There are a few ways to deal with the staring:

  1. Stare Back: Just stare back at them. Many people say they stop staring once you do this.

  2. Say "Why?": A quick "왜요?" ("Why?") usually makes them apologize and look away.

  3. Lean In: Make deep eye contact, lean forward, and give them all your attention. It can be pretty funny and makes them uncomfortable.

  4. Stare at Their Forehead: This makes them super uncomfortable because it feels like you’re looking down on them.

  5. Smile and Greet: Sometimes just smiling and saying a simple greeting in Korean catches them off guard and makes them smile back.

The Friendly Ajossi and Ajumma

On the flip side, there are those who are kind and helpful. Sarah remembers a time when she was ordering at a cafe, and a kind ajossi gave her a cookie and started teaching her Korean words. His kindness and patience made her feel welcome and more comfortable in the new environment.

Why The Difference?

So why the big difference in behavior? It might be because older generations in Korea didn’t grow up with as many foreigners around. For some, seeing foreigners is still a bit of a novelty, so they stare out of curiosity. For others, especially those who might have had more interactions with foreigners, they are more accustomed to it and act more naturally.

Share Your Experiences

Have you experienced similar treatment from ajossi and ajumma in Korea? Do you have any stories to share? Feel free to share your experiences or thoughts!

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